The distribution industry is known for its obsession with performance metrics. And rightly so. We track lines per hour, cost per line, errors per thousand, injury rates, bin-level inventory accuracy, OTIF (On-Time In-Full), order cycle time, space utilization, dock-to-stock speed, and EBITDA per square foot. We know how to measure everything that moves, ships, or scans.

But here’s what we struggle to measure: soft skills.

And I’d argue that’s exactly what makes them so powerful, because the most impactful things in leadership can’t always be measured on a dashboard.

From Orders to Outcomes: My Own Wake-Up Call

Early in my career, I was all about the mission. The Marine Corps taught me the value of precision, execution, and taking the hill, no matter what. I learned discipline, urgency, and accountability. What I didn’t know was empathy, or how to meet people where they are.

When I transitioned off active duty and joined the reserves, that culture shift hit me hard. Reserve Marines weren’t used to the same level of intensity. In my annual fitness report, one of my officers wrote that I needed to be more “touchy-feely with the Marines.”

It stung. But he was right.

I didn’t know it then, but that was my first lesson in emotional intelligence. A lesson I would learn again, more publicly, in my civilian career.

Distribution Without Diplomacy

At Coca-Cola, I brought that same Marine Corps intensity. And I got results. But I also got friction. A senior sales leader once pulled me aside. He said he respected my work ethic and results, but that my delivery was upsetting his team.

Here’s the thing: I was always right. But I didn’t realize that being right isn’t enough.

One story stands out. A sales rep asked why a promoted item was out of stock. I shot back: “We can’t magically get product from France in under a week. You didn’t update your forecast.”

Factually accurate? Yes. Helpful? Not at all.

That same sales leader gave me a better way. He said, “Next time, try explaining how the ordering process works. Say something like, ‘For imported items, I need six weeks’ notice to ensure we can support demand spikes like this.'”

That advice stuck with me. Instead of shutting people down, I learned to bring them in.

Why Soft Skills Are Hard

In distribution, we’re wired for throughput. Soft skills like communication, empathy, listening, and collaboration can feel like a luxury. But they’re a necessity.

Let me break a few of them down the way I’ve seen them play out on the floor:

• Active Listening: This isn’t just nodding while someone talks. It’s paying attention to what they’re really saying or not saying. When a team member complains about a missed deadline, the real issue might be a lack of clarity or stress at home. I’ll ask questions like, “What’s been getting in your way?” or reflect what I’m hearing: “Sounds like you’re getting pulled in too many directions.” It’s about tone, body language, and timing. Active listening helps you solve the real problem, not just the surface noise.
• Conflict Resolution: Picture two shift leads arguing over daily cleanup. Instead of taking sides or throwing out a quick fix, I pull them aside and let them get it out. Then, I guide them back to the root cause: was it poor handoff, unclear roles, or stress? When you turn blowups into learning moments and ask, “How do we prevent this from happening again?” It builds accountability instead of resentment.
• Empathy: We’ve all seen an associate’s performance dip, and the default response is to assume they’ve checked out. But authentic leadership means asking why. Maybe it’s family issues, burnout, or they’re struggling with a new process. You might notice it in their body language, slouched shoulders, and avoiding eye contact. That’s when I’ll say, “You’ve seemed stretched thin lately. What’s going on?” Empathy isn’t coddling. It’s about seeing people as people and adjusting your support.
• Coaching: If a supervisor is struggling with the schedule, the easy thing is to fix it yourself. But that’s a short-term win. Instead, I ask, “What have you tried? What’s getting in your way?” I want them to think through the issue, try innovative ideas, and own the solution. That’s how you grow future leaders, not just troubleshooters.
• Situational Awareness: This one might be the most underrated. Leadership isn’t a one-size-fits-all job. After a tough peak season, the team needs encouragement more than a push. Other times, they’re ready to be challenged. You’ve got to read the room, energy levels, chatter on the floor, error trends, and adjust. It’s the difference between motivating and overwhelming your team.

These aren’t soft skills. They’re human skills. And if you want to lead people, not just processes, you need them.

Emotional Intelligence on the Floor

Here’s a real-world scenario I bet most of you have seen:

A high-performing warehouse associate starts missing targets. Historically rock-solid, they suddenly rack up mis-picks and call in more often. The instinct might be to assume they’ve checked out.

But what if you paused and asked what’s going on?

They’re caring for a sick parent. They’re juggling a second job. They’re burned out.

When you lead with emotional intelligence, you don’t lower the bar; you create conditions for people to rise to it.

I saw this firsthand at Grainger during the early days of COVID-19. We had over 700 team members working three shifts in a million-square-foot facility, and the entire world was upside down. People were scared. No one had answers. And unlike many corporate jobs, there was no work-from-home option for those of us in distribution.

So, I did what I could: I showed up. I kept my 1:1s with my direct reports weekly and held quarterly check-ins with their direct reports. I spent time on the floor, not micromanaging but asking how people were doing and how their families were holding up. I couldn’t fix what was happening in the world, but I could listen. I could show up. And that made a difference.

Later at Infor, I carried that same mindset into a quite different environment. I’d visit customers alongside sales reps to check in on implementations or explore additional product opportunities. But most of the time, my value wasn’t in pitching anything but listening. Leaders would open up about frustrations with internal politics, change resistance, or poor user adoption. They didn’t need judgment. They didn’t need a script. They just needed someone to hear them. And surprisingly, just that small act, being an unbiased ear, would often shift the conversation. Sometimes, it even opens the door for deeper partnerships or additional business.

People don’t forget that when you listen without an agenda.

Feedback: The Mirror That Shows You What Metrics Don’t

Another part of being emotionally intelligent is having the ability to receive and use feedback.

Let’s be honest, sitting back and hearing what you’re doing wrong is never easy. Your fight-or-flight instinct can kick in, and if you’re not careful, you’ll make the situation worse instead of better.

It takes humility and a willingness to see feedback as a gift rather than a threat.

In fact, when someone cares enough to give you honest feedback, especially if it’s uncomfortable, you should value it even more. Most people avoid conflict. So, if someone is brave enough to tell you that a change is necessary, sit back, take a breath, and ask the most powerful question you can: How?

Asking the Right Questions

If you’re reading this and wondering how to get better at soft skills, start here:

• How do I respond when someone challenges me?
• Do people feel safe bringing me unwelcome news?
• Am I coaching or just correcting?
• When was the last time I asked someone how they’re doing, and what they really mean about it?

If we want to lead smarter warehouses, we need smarter conversations. And that starts with soft stuff.